Sex Game: Desayuno – An Uno Sex Game (with Breakfast Food)

It’s morning time, the smell of pancakes wafts through the air, and you’re in relaxed attire. Breakfast is served, but it’s not on a platter. (Desayuno is “breakfast” en español). This is a breakfast food Uno sex game.

Setup

Decide ahead of time which kind of clothing will be required. Choose between:

  • Pajamas
  • Robes
  • Underwear and lingerie

Each player must wear only the suitable type of clothing, and they should each be clean and fresh. Feel free to shower beforehand if there’s any question. Just make sure you rinse well. A soapy residue will leave an unpleasant taste is someone’s mouth.

In addition, you’ll need plenty of the foods listed in the General Supplies.

The game is set up according to traditional Uno rules.

Duration

The game is played until one player has played his or her last card and is declared the winner. At this point, all remaining food is divided equally for the players to use post-game.

Special Rules

The following special rules supplement traditional gameplay.

  • Draw 2 – Any player that plays a Draw 2 card must eat a base food off the other player’s exposed skin. The food will be determined by the Draw 2 card’s color.
    • Yellow: three banana slices
    • Red: three strawberry slices
    • Blue: seven blueberries
    • Green: one silver-dollar pancake
  • Wild – Any player that plays a Wild card must eat a silver-dollar sized drizzle (not a puddle) of topping off the other player’s exposed skin. When the player names the color the Wild card is to be, that color determines the topping to be used.
    • Yellow: chocolate syrup
    • Red: whipped cream
    • Blue: powdered sugar
    • Green: syrup or honey
  • Draw 4 Wild – Any player that plays a Draw 4 Wild card must eat a base food and topping off the other player’s unexposed skin, temporary pulling/moving aside the garment(s) that cover it. The named color determines the food to be used.
    • Yellow: three banana slices drizzled with chocolate syrup
    • Red: three strawberry slices topped with whipped cream
    • Blue: seven blueberries sprinkled with powdered sugar
    • Green: one silver-dollar pancake adhered using syrup or honey
  • Skip – Any player that plays a Skip card must be flashed for a number of seconds equal to the number value of the next card played. Each time a Skip card is played, the required flash location switches between above and below the waist. Number values for different cards include:
    • 1-9: the number on the card
    • 0: ten
    • Skip, Change Direction, or Draw 2: thirty
    • Wild or Draw 4 Wild: sixty
  • Change Direction – Any player that plays a Change Direction card must flash for a number of seconds equal to the number value of the next card played (see Skip rule above for number values). Each time a Change Direction card is played, the required flash location is switched between the front and the back.
  • Uno – If a player is caught failing to call “uno” when they have only one card remaining, they must allow one article of clothing to be removed. They cannot remove their own clothing. The article must remain removed until they remember to call “uno” the next time. This rule is in addition to the requirement to draw additional cards.
  • Winner – The winner is hand-fed their portion of the remaining food.
  • Loser – A loser eats all their portion of the remaining food off the other player’s exposed skin.